Ok here's the truth I've started about 5 different blog posts and meant to finish and post them all buuuut #momlife so here's a miss match of different blogs that I'm sure will feature my current mom brain enjoy 😜
Balance, finding balance with 2 kids........
Balance... hmm I'd say more like juggling. So how do you be an amazing wife and mother. Eat healthy, get your exercise in, remember to brush your teeth, get ready make meals.... the list goes on! The secret is......Wait for it.....
you settle the crap down give yourself some grace and take it one day at a time!!! Some days I truly feel like I'm rocking it! And some days i just want to curl up in a ball, cry and drink all of wine!! Nobody has it together 100% of the time and that is more than OK! Give yourself a break you are doing great, your kids love you and the sun will come out tomorrow.
For the most part I would say I am a positive person! I mean we all have our breaking points but 90% of the time I look for the rainbow after the storm. My mom often refers to me as the "peace maker" of the family. I absolutely hate confrontation. I may not agree with what you say or do but I will always be kind. And if I'm not asked point blank what my opinion is I will not give my opinion because I don't want to fight with you. I am very grounded in my beliefs and I don't need to argue my opinions to feel validation. I've always been like that. I don't like fighting I don't like drama so I stay out of it at all costs! I grew up in a family of 5 I'm the middle child and 4 out of five of us are females....so I have learned from experience!
I totally think momming is 1000 times easier when you are positive and look on the bright side! Plan and do fun things, Get out of your house, and get yourself some great mom friends!! Some of the ways I find "balance" are by going to my moms, having a girls night, waking up early to have some me time, exercising during naps, going on walks aka getting out of the house!!, play group, play dates, getting my eye lashes done and getting my nails done.
This time around post baby has been a whole new experience then with Lane! First of all Lane was up every 2 hours if not sooner for the first year of his life so I was basically just a zombie! We struggled with breast feeding for 11 long months which now that I think of it I could kick myself for!! I had plugged ducts, mastitis, and it was just never easy for us. This time around I was fully ready for the same experience except Ellie latched right away and things seemed great.....at first. Soon I realized every time I'd feed her she would be so gassy and so fussy. I tried feeding her more, cutting things out of my diet, ovol drops, gripe water etc! You name it I tried it she would just fuss and cry and it was SO hard especially with an adjusting 3 year old. I'll never forget the day Matt came home and told me enough was enough and to try the lactose sensitive formula! I was so scared and ashamed and emotional (hello hormones!) But I tried it and it was amazing! She was able to keep
It down she was way less gassy and so much happier! Things only got better from there! Today I am NOT ashamed to say she is formula fed! Yes breast is the healthiest option if you can do it. But it was not for Ellie! She has done so well and is flourishing in the growth and development charts! Formula feeding has been so great for us because Matt has been able to help out so much more! I can still go on dates with Lane and not worry about getting home in time to nurse. It has been so much easier this time around to find time for me, which in turn makes me a better mom, wife and all around person. Not to say you can't do that when your breastfeeding! You totally can I just didn't! I feel like you figure a lot of stuff out and don't sweat the small stuff as much the second time around!
Something I have had to overcome with motherhood is that honestly... nothing goes as planned anymore! And for me that's hard. I do well with routine and with a schedule. I've had to let go of that a bit and realize that there is no point in stressing over the little things! Like last week for example I had plans to go meet two of my girl friends for a play date but Ellie had an awful night and was coughing and congested so I didn't dare expose their kiddos to it! I was and am still SO bummed!! Another thing I have had to overcome/ over compensate for is being on time! If you know me, you know I'm the be there 15 min early type person I may sit in the parking lot until I have to be there but I like to be early! So I've learned to be more flexible with this! Instead of saying a specific time I now say I'll text you when I'm on my way!! Lol
I feel like I still barely know how to be a mom of two but we roll with it! I swear I always forget something and if my head wasn't attached I'd forget that too!! I feel like I'm continually juggling everything but lucky me I have the BEST support system who help with almost anything when I take the time to ask! For example after a very long week of my amazing hunky lineman husband working ALOT of over time I was exhausted and just really feeling like I needed a break and before I could even talk to Matt about it he suggested I take a night off, so on the weekend me and one of my besties went on a girls night! It was SO nice we laughed and talked about our kiddos we enjoyed our supper with no interruptions and we even got to eat it when it was still hot 🙌🏼 #momwin we both of course missed our kiddos but it was just so nice to catch up! We most definitely drank way to much but we had the BEST time we danced our little hearts out and for a few hours we were just us! Ok now I want to address the SHAME that gets thrown at moms when they decide to go out and enjoy a night kid free.... because I've gotten it and I'm sure I will forever continue to get it. And to all you haters keep on keeping on! I had such a great time and I'm a damn good Momma and I whole heartedly believe that I'm being a better mom by taking some time for myself to reset, recharge and come back to my kiddos feeling great and missing them like crazy! You do not have to give up who you are when you become a mom. I know how important it is to still work on yourself and do things you are passionate about. You still need to chase your dreams and be happy! Your kids want a happy mom! A mom that inspires them and teaches them to take care of themselves, love themselves and to have FUN!! Life is what you make it people, make it fun!!
We all have bad days, we all have great days and we all have pretty good days! I hope you can all see the beauty in each day. I always try to before I go to sleep at night to thing of 3 great things that happened that day it instantly puts a smile on my face and helps me to get a good night sleep! Try not to sweat the small things Momma's we are all just doing our best!
Xo Ashylla
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